I’ve been having a hell of a time with the quitting. Between friday and saturday night / sunday morning, I had a total of 5 cigarettes. Five! That’s a quarter-pack! These smokes didn’t do much to give me a buzz like that one I had earlier in the week; all they did was give me …
Category Archives: Health
Days 13 through 16
Hey folks. Been a few days going, but I finally have a bit of time, energy, and attention to sit down and write a log. Since, oh, Tuesday, I’ve been doing well with my lungs. I discovered Tuesday night, after an absconded cigarette which made my lungs clench and crud up, that for the prior …
Gentle Is the Noise, Painful Is the Chaos
The messed-up dreams continue. This morning I was shocked awake again, this time just 10 minutes before my alarms were set to go off. Dreamed I was involved in a breakup, maybe mine, maybe someone else’s. In an effort to seek comfort, I grabbed a carload of friends and we went riding around. Found ourselves …
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Days 11 and 12
The cravings continue, but the lung crud doesn’t. I’m already starting to breathe a good deal better. I am so happy about that. The fact that my lungs are feeling good makes them crave the tightening ache of tobacco smoke again, and that’s what’s making the quitting that much harder. So far, outside of a …
Day 10
Today has totally sucked. I’m growing really, really tired of the chest tightness. Fucking sucks. Sometimes it gets to be too much and I start to have a panic attack. Have to force myself to breathe and come down off of it. Discovered that the Xanax I’m taking for acute panic attacks is bad, bad, …