Baisé Trois Façons

The current political climate in the United States can be summed up with this contrived example.

Republican candidate: Our platform is one of job creation and innovation through support of the SexBot industry. Our tactic is two-pronged. By reducing taxes and providing incentives to sex robot manufacturers, we can create jobs and stabilize the economy. And by supporting our homegrown sex robot companies, we keep ourselves free from the moral and economic complications of prostitution. Since robots are not blessed with the same breath of life endowed to us by our Creator, the Christian principles our great country were founded on will stand firm and strong. Vote for me, and let’s take our country back.

Democratic candidate: What our opponent proposes is to undermine small businesses nationwide, starting at the bottom. Every sex worker, whether working alone or as a member of a small business team, will be put out of work. That money paid by American consumers will instead go to multinational sex robot corporations who, though may have offices in the US, have offshore accounts and factories located outside our country’s borders, where the money will filter to the top with little left over for the outsourced factory workers at the bottom. This is unfair to honest American workers who deserve fair pay for fair work. Our platform proposes full recognition of all forms of sex work, and full medical testing and care for all people, no matter their choice of career. Vote for me, and let’s sponsor true job growth and move forward.

Libertarian candidate: It is ultimately up to the consumer to decide with whom they will have sexual relations. It is not the Federal government’s position to interfere with the invisible hands in the jobs sector. What our party proposes is to eliminate all restrictions and provide full legalization of sex work, and allow sex workers and sex robot manufacturers to compete on a fair playing field. I also propose to eliminate funding for the National Institutes of Health and the U.S. Department of Health whose standards are infringing on the rights of private businesses. By lifting the Federal burden, private sex businesses can cut costs and deliver services at more profitable and competitive levels. Vote for me, and let’s get to work.

Published by Shawn

He's just this guy, you know?