Welcome to Phaysis

Welcome to my site. Seems these days my site is more like an online storage space than a usable website. Not doing so many things for the site. Things around here are at a standstill, more or less.

Well, that’s a half-truth. I still peck at code every now and then, trying to build something usable for my site as a content management system. There are tons of those systems online already, but I want to roll my own. There’s pride in doing that.

So, yeah. Look at stuff. Enjoy the site. I’m considering a redesign some time soon. Meh.

Giving You the Finger


I’ve been a little twisted up inside of late. Holding a lot of stuff back. Suppose it’s for the best. Dunno. Verdict’s still out.

Let’s start with the inane:

I bought a new computer keyboard. The old one was four years old, and after the two hours of cleaning I did on it last Saturday, it was less a rubber membrane and the key action went from bad to very rough. I got seriously tired of having to communicate through keys that didn’t want to go down. With the anger I was feeling over the last weekend, not being able to express it added fuel to the fire. So Tuesday I bought a new keyboard, and I’m so loving it. Typing is a pleasure. A finger orgy. Party at the computer.

I bought a wireless access point for the apartment a week ago. Got it configured with encryption (weak, as it were) and access control. Got my laptop to work with it, and my roomate bought a wireless card for his laptop so he could take advantage of it as well. We’re all configured now. Everyone happy. Party in the street.

Remember the journal entry I made a few months back listing people I went to college with? One of them randomly emailed me last weekend with my message gateway. It was excellent to hear from her. She said that she was looking up some data on her family history, and her full name appeared. She followed the link to my site, and was astonished to hear her nickname. See, that’s exactly why I made that entry. I banked on the gamble that someone from that list, some how some way would search for their name and find that entry and the message to them. And it worked. We’re emailing each other, catching up. Is good. Party in the email client.

Work is picking up, slowly but surely. I’m still not so happy with the job, but it’s work, it’s a steady paycheck, it’s security, it’s something to get me away from the drama that follows me. Tomorrow looks to be a busy day, which is completely within the Friday idiom. Much happiness. A party in the bindery room.

‘Scuse me, but I really like Digital Gunfire. You don’t like industrial music? You can suck it. Wait, you do? Go there. Love it. Caress it. Put it in vinyl and whip it. It’s your choice. Party in the dungeon.

I made some strides with one of my ongoing programming projects last weekend. It works. I’m happy. Party in the login script.

Maybe this weekend will be less, um, shitty. Party in your pants.

Notes from Denny’s #6656

Transcribed from an offline journal entry written on Sunday, July 4th:

I do hate coming home for the weekend.

Same story. I get stuck in the house, for usually no good reason, and then go out a bit late in the day to plan something usefull. I dunno.

I’m currently sitting at Denny’s waiting on my meal. First meal today. And it’s 6:40pm. I should’ve called around to some of my friends, see what’s up and what’s going on. Today is the Fourth; no sense in wandering around aimlessly, but it looks like an eminent possibility.

Coming home is fine sometimes, and a drag other times. I was all gung-ho about visiting on thursday and friday. Around 7pm friday, things just wound down, and I wasn’t so interested, but I went anyway. And I’m here. I saw the town fireworks last night. Meh. About as interesting as any other town’s fireworks display. Getting into the park was little trouble. Getting out was the bitch and the bastard. Took me 45 minutes. Senseless. I was two city blocks from the interstate. Bleh.

But I left and drove around. Went out to Phil and Sandy’s place, cruised pasted to see if their pool party shindig was still happening. Didn’t see much of anything, so I drove on. Wandered around, stopped at a quickmart to pick up something to quench my dehydrated self, and went to see my core group of friends. As expected, they were all congregating, but they were congregating to throw a going-away-to-Japan party for a friend of theirs who works for a defense contractor. Got to meet him in real life for once; nice guy. I didn’t leave that clump of houses and their hospitality until around 4am. Snoozily drove myself back to my cousin’s house after grabbing something to eat and crashed out on the couch, light on, tv up.

Slept hard until 12:30, a half-hour before I had planned on waking up. And, as usual, I sat on the couch and watched TV; got suckerpunched into watching “Highlander”. Bleh. I’m sure the movie was good back in the day. I’m sure of it. But this whole pre-digital effects thing is so, um, 1980’s. But I finally got my ass up and moving, took a shower, got dressed, and around then my mother came home from work, so I hung out and chatted with her. That’s always a good thing. Got to see her room out back. Interesting. A one-room shack is where she lives. The shack’s been in the family for decades now, and after two uncles and two cousins, my mother now lives there. The rent’s cheap, which is good enough for her. She’s a real trooper.

I’m currently listening to the new Skinny Puppy album. Picked it up thursday. This weekend it’s been my salvation; a link of sorts with the larger world. I stacked a good mp3 collection on my laptop for the driving jukebox, among them is a cdrom full of industrial, futurepop, and rivethead-ambient songs ripped from Digital Gunfire. All of this has been my salvation, this angry, dark, and socially-disgusted music. The sun is out, the days are getting brighter, and my soul is inside, getting darker. Feh.

There went my Goth moment of the week. Heh.

But I can’t help it to not laugh or sneer when I look at all these little people in this little town. I used to think they were something, and they WERE something, but I left town. I saw larger things, larger places, larger people. These people aren’t so something anymore. And I can’t help but look at them as if they were like the cattle that they raise. A lot of good, decent, life-affirming “salt of the earth” folks here, and I can’t see them for anything special because this town has nothing, nothing to offer but chain restaurants, chain stores and chain smoking.

Sure, these are the people that make up 60% of this country. I’ll accept that. Grass-roots working folk. That’s no problem. Our country needs them. But it’s just impossible for me to see them as being anything but shallow, non-evaluating people who see only to the immediate needs of tending to their job first, their families second, and their future third. Their potential is just not considered at all. Potential is just not even on their radar. To them, potential is something only their “smarter than yours” children can possess; potential is just not for them because they have to work. And that’s how I see it all here. Just cattle.

Save me from this narrow-eyed mindset.

On the Road: AUS2TXK 2004/07


Shawn Thomas (Nasdaq ticker: SHAT), the cult of personality that brought you Miniflims(tm) and “Johnny the Original Greek”, and innovator in computer advertising with the “Your Mother Loves my Wang!” campaign, announced today his intent to relocate business operations to the city of Texarkana, Arkansas for the weekend of the Fourth of July, a federal holiday. The move and change of venue is to begin on the evening of Friday, July 2nd, 2004 and is expected to extend in duration to the afternoon of Monday, July 5th. The corporate office is currently in Austin, Texas.

All vested interests, and those related to or affiliated with Shawn Thomas, are requested to make note of these temporary changes and to provide suitable accomodations and business arrangements. Of greatest note is the length of stay intended; due to the federal holiday, Shawn Thomas has the unique opportunity to maximize this business transition through the singular capability of spending three days instead of two days to pursue his business and personal interests. It is expected that this extra day will be invested in mutual stocks with short-term dividends and long-term gains, with focus on strengthening ongoing partnerships with affiliates, contacts, and related businesses.

Shawn Thomas is a privately-held sole proprietorship in business since March of 1972. This press release contains claims and forward-looking statements which reflect intentions that may change at any moment, and are not intended for use as nor replacements for professional investment advice. For further information, please contact Shawn Thomas at his Office of Public Relations at http://www.phaysis.com/email.cgi.