So, something occurred to me. I am not a man, and I have proof.
- I don’t own a house, nor do I pay on a mortgage.
- I am not married, nor have I ever had a fiancÃ©.
- My last girlfriend was over a decade ago.
- I do not have children (sired, hired, or otherwise).
- I hate football. American football.
- I dislike sports, board games, video games, card games.
- I am the most uncompetitive person you know.
So there it is. There can be no other explanation for my complete lack of manly testosterone-drenched wall-punching ground-standing power and respect. It’s so obvious, it’d take a hermaphroditic transgendered eunuch on hormone replacement therapy to not see it.