So, something occurred to me. I am not a man, and I have proof.

  1. I don’t own a house, nor do I pay on a mortgage.
  2. I am not married, nor have I ever had a fiancé.
  3. My last girlfriend was over a decade ago.
  4. I do not have children (sired, hired, or otherwise).
  5. I hate football. American football.
  6. I dislike sports, board games, video games, card games.
  7. I am the most uncompetitive person you know.

So there it is. There can be no other explanation for my complete lack of manly testosterone-drenched wall-punching ground-standing power and respect. It’s so obvious, it’d take a hermaphroditic transgendered eunuch on hormone replacement therapy to not see it.

Published by Shawn

He's just this guy, you know?

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