Man, today has been a rollercoaster, and I haven’t even been awake for two hours yet.

Ok. First things first: I wake up just before noon, a few minutes before my alarm was set to go off. Have to pee real bad, and I had to do it in record time, before my alarm went off (didn’t feel like jarring myself with its noise). Happily, that whole thing went off without a hitch.

So. Bladder emptied, alarm disabled, I go to my computer to wake it up. Waitaminute, it’s not on. Did I turn my monitor off? Can’t remember. Not unless I did it in my sleep. I sleepwalk? Wait a minute: I can’t hear the CPU fan. Aw, shit. It’s shut off. We had a power outage. We had a power outage? Damn. Battery backup hasn’t turned back on. Ok. I reach down and toggle the backup’s switch, my system turns on. Feh. Have to tweak with some BIOS issues, then I continue booting. Mmm. Norton Disk Doctor, yes I want to fix errors, no I don’t want to make an undo disk. Feh. Ok. Finally, I can log into windows. What? I can’t get online? Christ, this is gonna be a long ride.

I go to the kitchen to grab a coke, notice the coffee machine’s clock was flashing. Ok, yes we *did* have an outage. Ok. I turn on the linux server’s monitor and log in as root. What? There’s no trace of the power outage in the system logs? Huh?! That server’s UPS lasts for, like, half an hour. The server would’ve noticed a power outage. Not a trace. I am confused.

I check the internet connection. Appears fine from the server. Hmm. Go back to my room for a smoke, check again, nothing. Ok, something is definitely gone south. Back at the server, I check the firewall settings. Hmm. The firewall kernel module isn’t even loaded. I load it, tweak a few things, still nothing. I do a shutdown and reboot. On the reboot, the server’s init notices the drives weren’t unmounted properly and does a scan on the drives. Reboot continues as normal. Log back in, check the connection. Still fine from there, but the firewall module still wasn’t loaded. Good gawd. I load it again, and this time I run the firewall config tool. Ok, good. It’s loaded and working. Back to my bedroom computer — what do we have? We’re ONLINE!

I am much relieved.

So, a few smokes and a sandwich later, I check my bank account. What? There’s more money in there that I didn’t put in there! Could it be? Well, paint me green and call me money, the Feds decided to let me have my tax return! Hell yeah! I immediately place a large portion of it in my poor little flagging savings account and badda-bing, I’m a happier man.

You know, I’m a simple man with simple pleasures and simple needs. All I need is sleep, elimination, nicotine, caffeine, nutrition, an internet connection, and surprise money. And I got all of those needs in the first hour of my day! Fuck yeah!

Ah, today’s gonna be a gooood day. I got Eeyore’s Birthday to attend. Let’s see if I can get some of my other needs taken care of: booze, fun, community, companionship, and luuuuv sweeeet luuuuv, baby.

Pop a top and raise a can; this might be Shawn’s luckiest day.

Published by Shawn

He's just this guy, you know?