(Phaysis)

To get you all caught up to speed, now that I’ve had enough time to recover, the Nine Inch Nails show last wednesday was incredible. It was hot, it was sweaty, it was dusty, it was crowded, it was steamy, the pit was angry, the band was loud, and it was everything I had hoped it would be. Since my date fell through, I sold my “date ticket” to a friend of mine for dirt cheap (the friendship discount); I sold the other two tickets for relatively cheap (I’m not greedy) to some dude from San Antonio who made a request on craigslist. Once I got all three tickets out of my hands in exchange for money, I was finally happy and able to look forward to the show. All-in-all, I spent $144 on tickets and made $210, which means I got paid to go to see NIN. I like that.

The week before the NIN show, I got free passes to see the sneak preview of Star Wars Episode 3 before the rest of the world did. I kinda have a smug attitude about it, but it’s not every week I get to do something few others have the opportunity to do. Y’know? I’m planning to see Ep3 again this weekend. On my own dime.

My boss has taken to bringing his large dog to the shop. It sits in his office all day under the a/c instead of at home where it’s just too hot to leave the little doggie outside where it can walk itself. Last week I received a delivered package and proceeded to take it to the boss’s office. As I crossed the threshhold from the hallway to the office the dog lept up, took an offensive posture, and proceeded to bark at me in a deep tone. I backed up, put the package on the shelf next to the door, gave the boss a pissed and freaked-out look, and just left. He later apologized and decided that placing a handmade sign next to the door would prevent future disaster.

My Memorial Day weekend wasn’t as grand nor as fun as I had wanted. One of my plans was to ride my bicycle as often as possible; thanks to the crappy weather (rain and storms almost every day/night) riding my bike and being out on it wasn’t such a smart idea. So I drove. Also, the allergens seem to be getting bad; every morning I woke up with headaches that don’t clear until some time after getting up. I still have the headaches. Stupid allergies. Add to that the migraine I had on sunday night and then trying to recover from it on monday.

There weren’t too many problems with the weekend itself, tho. It’s just that overall things were just bland, unexciting. Icky, if you will. Just…blah. No overarching excitement; no bonus, no rewards. Just moodiness and sticky May weather.

It appears my car has taken up the habit of smoking. I don’t know why, but it’s been getting worse over the past 4 months. It’s kinda embarrassing, y’know? I mean, I know my car has 158,000 miles on it (original engine), so some smoke should be normal, but not this much. It’s turning into one of those cars you call the DPS about to complain about the pollution. I don’t know if I’m burning oil – well, I know it’s been burning slight amounts of oil for years – but that much? I also know there’s a crack in my exhaust manifold; would that affect my emissions controls that much to make me burn a rich mixture? The smoke really isn’t so apparent until I’ve been sitting at an idle for a little bit, like at a traffic light or a drive-thru lane, and then when I step on the gas to move the smoke just billows out. It’s blue-grey and white.

I love my car; I’m used to it. It has become a part of me and my life. It is the only expensive thing I own. I don’t want to trade it in for another 3 years of car payments. Yet rebuilding or replacing the engine, though it seems like a cheaper option, might actually be the wrong thing to do considering the 12-year age of the car. I just don’t know yet. I’m planning on getting some professional advice on the matter first thing this weekend. So we’ll see.

In the meanwhile, now that the weather’s permitting, I’ve taken to riding my bike more often. Maybe outside of the car thing I can make a weekend of riding my bike. Yesterday I felt like I was having heart/chest problems — it must’ve been heartburn because I had no problem hopping on the bike after work.

My friends Ed and Melanie are expecting and tomorrow is the day. The baby (a girl) was expected last weekend but she was taking her time. Mel’s O.B. decided to induce labor this friday, so congratulations to them. I’ll see them this weekend when I visit the delivery ward at their hospital.

For what it’s worth, the Republic of Texas Biker Rally (remember me talking about that 2 years ago?) is back in town. Apparently it’s every year on the weekend after Memorial Day weekend; I had gotten confused. Maybe I’ll go downtown and look at the bikes for something to do. Or maybe I’ll go downtown and fake unconsciousness to see how many doctors leave their bikes to come resuscitate me. Who’s to know?

Ok, hope this passes for a journal update.

After a nice, warm week, a cold front blew through on Friday evening and chilled us down. It’s been a decent weekend for going out; granted it’s been overcast and rain has been a threat. But today I overcame gravity and answered a deep urge to get out with my bicycle. It’s my second ride since I knocked the winter dust off of it. Really feels kinda nice riding again.

You just get that urge, y’know?

My teeth are doing better. The right fillings aren’t so sensitive anymore which is fortunate because the lefts are still tender from the week-old fillings. I’m having my right wisdoms removed this wednesday, so hopefully my left molars will be fine enough to eat on. After the wisdom holes heal up, I’ll be good to go until I can afford to get the left wisdoms removed. And then hopefully the dental drama will be over with.

I called my sister last wednesday to wish her a happy 28th birthday (that means I’m getting old, too). Surprise of all surprises, her cellphone is out of service. Looks to me like she and her hubby haven’t been paying the bill. I might try later this week, but shit at least I tried. Y’know?

Work is picking up. After a tedious week of very little to do, but with a ton of stuff just waiting on customer go-ahead, it’s finally avalanching and we have rush jobs and lots of stuff to do. Lots of ass is being kicked.

This Saturday is Eeyore’s Birthday Party down at Pease Park. It’s a rite of spring, a hippy holdover for 42 years running. It’s dirty, it’s hot, it’s dusty, it’s sweaty, there are massive drum circles, reggae and rasta bands, people in costumes, people wearing little more than shorts and body paint, the smell of cannabis floats in the air, and the cops just walk around and not care.

This is an event that I look forward to months in advance. My whole regimen of allergy shots is inspired by being able to go to EB without allergy problems. I bought a bike last year so I could ride it down there. And this year it is my hope that my mouth is well enough to let me go. I’d hate to miss it 2 years in a row.

Ok. Sun’s setting soon; should wrap this up and ride on home.

So, it’s been 3 weeks or so since last entry. All’s been quiet on the web front, but stormy and busy in the real life. So, in lieu of going into details and flooding you fine folks with the useless minutia of my daily ongoings, I’ll sprinkle you with a general survey of this time period.

Tooth thing, done:

Ok. On the, um, 15th of the month, I got my root canal finished. They filled the roots, mounted the new permanent ceramic cap, and made sure everything fit perfectly. After the swelling and tenderness died down two days later, I was revelling in the ability to eat with both sides of my mouth. Things were back to normal.

Now, a SXSW Diversion:

Some time ago, my friend Sean messaged me to advise me about a band who was coming to this year’s South By SouthWest music festival. The band is Pilotdrift. He said what’s unique about them is that they are from, of all places, Texarkana. Yeah, that’s correct. I checked out their sample song on the SXSW site and was thoroughly intrigued. So Thursday, the 17th, I made the drive downtown to see them play. I was impressed that 6 guys from T-town can create, and get exposure, with a sound that’s reminiscent of Radiohead, Pink Floyd, and “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.” So incredibly bizarre. They handed out free CDs after the show and I had a quick chat with some of the members, all from my home town. Kinda cool.

Before Pilotdrift’s set, I had the pleasure of listening to a band from Albuquerque, NM called The Oktober People. Wow, these guys are good. Melodic rock, like Godspeed You Black Emperor meets Catherine Wheel. Solid, dreamy landscape of well-effected guitars; lyrics that sway between dreams, dark interpersonal rifts, regrets for dead loved ones, and anger with current politics. They gave away a boxfull of CDs as well.

The next night I took the opportunity to go see local underground favorites Zykos play at the old Ritz theater on 6th Street. I got in after a song or two, but watched the rest of the set. Managed to end up standing right at the edge of the stage before show’s end. They put on powerful, energetic set. Their sound is pure indie rock; as emo as I’ll allow myself. It’s Emo for those who hate Emo. I just love their sound and their vibe.

I managed to take my camera in to all these shows. I have the pictures processed, I just have to post them some time. But, overall, I think my first foray into doing anything related to SXSW went rather well. And no wristband was needed. Heh.

Wait, more dental drama:

The next tuesday, a week later, I was due for a general dental checkup. Well, the dentist was sick, so it was postponed a week later, the 29th. That would soon change on Wednesday the 23rd during breakfast when the bottom right wisdom tooth, the one immediately underneath my new ceramic cap decided to fracture and split into little chunks. My appetite disappeared quickly.

I called the dentist to see if I could have the appointment moved up; they agreed and found a time for me on the following day, Thursday. Given that I was leaving town for Texarkana that night, I had no other choice; things had to get done. They took X-rays, probed around, stuck my gums and got a general plan of action regarding my teeth: a cleaning, 7 cavities filled, and removal of all four wisdom teeth. Yikes. And still no immediate help or advice on my broken and still fragmenting tooth.

The Easter diversion:

That night I drove to Texarkana to visit family and friends for the easter weekend. Now that I’m a (mostly) law-abiding citizen and I drive (just over) the speed limit, it takes me 6 1/2 hours to get home by the back highways. Sucks, but ah well. Didn’t make the drowsiness any easier. I swear, all day I was hyper, up, I had things clicking left and right, stuff got done, and I was totally with it. Yet, some time before I hit the road, the vigor just left. Just vanished. :sighs:

The weekend was pleasant for the most part. It was good to see everyone again. The allergy season is on in full effect there, and I tried my best to be prepared. But there’s little to prepare me for the fact that everyone has pets and almost everyone smokes. For the sake of breathing, I took every opportunity to step outside for some fresh air. I can take the pollen, but not the pet dander.

Friday, completely zonked from the energy expenditure and from the driving, I celebrated my 33rd29th birthday by sleeping-in on the mildly uncomfortable bed my neices let me use, then by treating myself to a solitary breakfast at IHOP and some journal time before I had to meet my family somewhere or something. It was the last mostly-sunny day all weekend. Meh.

Now that my brother-in-law is saved and is heavy into church, his and my sister’s family are also heavy into church. Even my mother is doing church things; she hasn’t done that, really, since a few years before I stopped going to Beech Street FBC. It’s just weird. The tables are completely reversed; now I am the atheist, now they are the christians. Most of the steps and behaviors and beliefs I see them doing I once did myself, and as a recovering christian I just want to wake them up to see things my way, do expose what it is I’m seeing in the mixture of politics, society, and behavior management that is Religion. But it’s wrong of me to do so; it’s wrong of me to break their worldview. Any attempt would destroy my relationship with them.

As it goes: “Whatever keeps them in the straight and narrow is good for the family.”

So most of the weekend I bit my tongue. Didn’t really communicate with the family as freely as I’d liked simply because they’re trying to raise a godly household. I love ‘em a lot, but the whole thing’s just weird. They tried to get me to go to church on easter sunday morning. I mutedly refused and slept in. The idea was to get pictures of the whole family at the altar or something. I was hoping they’d take them after service, so that’s when I went; stood outside until service was over, then went to find them. I wasted a trip.

The big family get-together at my uncle Ronnie’s and aunt Francis’ house was really nice. 3/4″ T-bone steaks for all. Still the cold and windy weather, so it could’ve been better. I was already packed up and ready to hit the road, so I left from there after hugging everyone g’bye.

Tooth, always with the teeth:

Now back to the broken tooth. Luckily there was no pain, but during the easter weekend, I was still spitting out a piece of tooth at least once a day. The last piece to come out came out sunday, so it appears that’s all for now. Thankfully. And still no pain. So I’m just biding time until the extractions.

So, monday, I get the cleaning done. The hygenist offers no advice either, and recommends I set an appointment to see the oral surgeon when he comes in on Wednesday (today). So I do, and I did.

Went in, discussed with the surgeon. He looked at my x-rays and agreed that all four wisdoms should come out. He sent the chart to the front for the clerks to calculate the price. $1180-ish. Fucking christ. After my insurance’s paltry $116 contribution, my bill comes to $1075 or so, and even though I’m on an ongoing payment plan, they’ll expect half of that amount as a down payment on the day of the procedure. What…the…hell? It appears that my extractions will have to wait.

My decision, in the meanwhile, is to probe elsewhere for alternatives. Tomorrow morning, I’ll attempt to call the UT Dental School in San Antonio (remember them?) to see about the price, the terms, and to set an appointment. My friend Sarah had two of her wisdoms pulled there for cheap, and they were so gentle she didn’t need the pain meds they gave her. She offered to drive for me should I need it and should she have that day off. So I’ll check that route. If it pans out, I’ll cancel my extraction appointment for next Wednesday with Castle Dental with a “thank you” and go back to them on the 10th for 4 fillings, then some time later for the other 3 fillings.

If things fall into place, I’ll be a new man with good (or well-repaired) teeth.

With Teeth:

Y’know, it all seems incredibly appropriate. Next month, April, will mark the release of the brand new Nine Inch Nails album “With Teeth”. How so very weird. And, wait — what’s that? It appears I have tickets to see NIN on May the 25th right here in Austin. God, it feels so nice. (No, they’re not for sale.)

So, I lied:

Ok, so I lied. I said I’d give a brief sprinkling, drizzling overview of what all has been happening in my web silence. I lied. Hope I didn’t lose anyone. So what do you folks make of all this? Any advice on my teeth situation? It just sucks that it all waited until now *boom* to demand attention. I’m just kinda drained mentally, physically, and financially, trying to be well. And it all sucks. Let me know by saying something. I’d like your feedback. Thanks!

Oh, speaking of emails, who are you, BarbaraJoeThomas? Why would I know you? How would you know me? Are you confusing me for someone in your family who is having interpersonal problems with you? Please give me more info before I decide to write back to you. Thanks.

THAT IS ALL.

Today was beautiful. For the most part. I woke up at 11:30am and lazed around. Then, around noon-thirty, the exterminator knocks on my door to spray the apartment. Fine, I let him in after I put on some pants. He walked around and sprayed his “non-toxic” stuff around the baseboards and under the cabinets and next to the air intakes of my computers. The bastard. After seeing my CD collection while spraying and letting fly with comments like, “what, you a music lover?” he left. I bummed around some more until hunger and eye irritation (from the bug spray) overtook my resolve to vegetate and I got dressed to leave.

On the way to the car, I stopped at my housemate’s truck to start it and recharge the battery after being parked for the week and a half he’s been gone out of state. The battery was dead, naturally, so I pulled my car around and jumpstarted his truck. Task number one complete.

After going for some lunch I bought some new shoes. Wearing them now (oh, the discomfort of breaking in new shoes). Tasks two and three complete.

Went back to the house and noticed that the place was stuffy (compared to the air outside) and it still smelled of bug spray. So, with the most excellent weather and nice breeze outside, I opened the windows. I had been thinking about cleaning the house, but I also had laundry to do; a quandary. I didn’t want to go to the laundromat and deal with that crowd, so I examined the laundromat at the apartment complex and found it was ok to use (usually it’s trashed and stinks of piss and bleach), which gave me a win-win situation. So I ran my loads of laundry while I attacked the apartment. White tornado action.

Vacuumed my room and the common areas the right way: by moving the furniture. Cleaned my bathroom. Used a sponge to spot-clean all the handprints, spots, and nicotine condensation from the walls. Cleaned the brown smudge marks from the front door knob. Dug around and pulled the stacks of accumulated newspapers for tossing. Reorganized the videotapes and DVDs. Windexed the coffee table. Broke down and discarded unneeded cardboard boxes. Dusted everywhere. Straightened all the couches and the cushions on them. Pushed everything around so it was square, straight, and neat. Watered the plants. Then *ding* the laundry was done. Tasks four, five, six, seven, eight, twenty, and nine-thousand complete.

And now, it is with pleasure that I announce that my apartment is clean and completely rocks.

I’m currently at Spiderhouse having some coffee. I like coffee, but only when it’s hot; given this weather, and the occasions I sit outside drinking coffee when it’s cold, my coffee cools off too fast. So I had to do something about it, y’know? Bought a briefcase thermos last night; holds about 16 ounces of coffee, which suits me fine. Smart Solutions for Dumb Problems.

I recognize absolutely nobody up here. I’m not sure if I like that or not. Essentially the only reason I come to Spiderhouse on the weekends is for some socialization with the few familiar faces that come here. With the cooling weather, those faces are fewer. So, I reckon I’d post a journal, get *something* done towards that end. So, with nobody really around as I had hoped, I’m getting kind of bummed out. Feeling my day of successes is crossing a threshhold; it’s becoming less of a good day. Y’know? Hope somebody shows up.

Ok, for those of you in Texarkana, please be alerted that I’ll be making a four-day visit this week for the christmas holiday season. My printshop is closed on xmas eve, so I’m taking vacation time on the day before (the 23rd). I will be leaving here on wednesday night and heading back here on sunday afternoon. I’ll do my best to stop by and wish everyone a happy festivus.

Festivus For the Rest of Us.

Our Traveller writes from the road:

Thursday, 11/25/04 Thanksgiving Day
So, in a nutshell, I’ve been in Texarkana for a day. I arrived around 6pm wednesday after driving for 6 1/2 hours. Traffic was fair, but the wind was rough; my car was being thrown around until I was almost to Henderson, TX, which is my 2/3 mark for the drive. I spent some of the evening with my sister and her kids, which was a loud, chaotic treat. Then around 9 I went to visit my mother at her place; we chatted and watched some TV, y’know, the warm family stuff. Heh. I left around 11 to get some food to settle my road-weary stomach. The Denny’s here, where I had spent several years of my life, has apparently gone downhill quite quickly. So sad. I left around midnight and got back to my sister’s house to settle my stomach and get some much needed up-since-7-am shuteye.

This morning, I had some fitful sleep as the kids were up and at ‘em. Woke up a few times from noise, some times from having a cold head or soreness from sleeping on a child’s bed. Finally got up rested around 10am. Chatted with the kids for a while; seems they’re incredibly happy to have Uncle Shawn around for a visit, and they’re eager to get my attention. Heh. Around noon I had the opportunity to get away and take a shower, get myself ready for the world. We all left the apartment at 1:30pm to go to have Thanksgiving feast with my brother-in-law’s family. Spent quite some time there tonight; ate my fill (of course), snoozed, and watched some TV, y’know, the whole “football and muscle cars” thing. I left around 9:30 to go visit with some of my Texarkana friends, but I decided that it was a little late in the evening to be “dropping in to say Hi”. It’d be kind of rude of me, so I just drove around town. Tried the new highway loop that was finished this year; now I can drive completely around town without leaving a controlled-access thoroughfare. Kinda neat, I guess. But, as a testament of how small this town is, it took me, driving completely at speed limit, only 21 minutes to do the loop.

I’m currently at the IHOP where my mother and cousin work. Neither of them are on shift. Just sitting here having some coffee and typing this journal. Texarkana is so different than Austin water, because the coffee at both Denny’s and IHOP has a dusty rubbing alcohol taste. It’s so weird. I’ve gotten so accustomed to the water back home (whichever town I’m in, the other town is “back home”).

This town is growing, still. It’s becoming more like Round Rock and Cedar Park; highways, SUV’s, and “big box” chain stores as far as the eye can see. More churches, too. And bank locations. As folks here say, “Texarkana is just ‘building up’.” I haven’t really cruised the downtown area, or gone much down Stateline Ave, or gone to see my friends at Moderne Primitives, but something tells me that downtown is still lying in decay and falling apart, a scene so ghostly not even the homeless will set up camp.

Oh. Those of you in Austin may wish to take note: there’s a BOB FM in Texarkana as well: 101.7MHz. So our BOB FM phenomenon is NOT unique. Sorry to break the news to you. Try looking it up.

I haven’t gotten online since I arrived, which is against my normal modus operandi. There’s no land phone service at my sister’s house, so I can’t do dialup there, and I haven’t gone wardriving yet. Something tells me I should be successful in finding some good open signals out there. And it has recently dawned on me that I might find wireless at the Schlotzskey’s franchise here, but that’s iffy. I really don’t want to go back to Sacred Grounds to deal with, and give my money to, those rabid christians in return for their high-minded crappy coffee and wireless access. But if it comes down to it….

Regardless of my close interaction and high exposure to a ton of cats and dogs here, my allergies have been nice to me. Even my chest is getting some needed rest; the constriction and congestion has taken a holiday it seems. If things go south when I go back to Austin, I Will Know something is up. It has to be the mold there; I wouldn’t doubt that there’s some hidden somewhere in my apartment’s outside walls. Undergoing allergy shot treatments might be a smart option; otherwise, it’s either live on allergy drugs and keep coughing or move away from central Texas.

I’m watching my laptop batteries drain as I write and sip my dusty coffee. It’s reminding me that my batteries are getting old; I need to look into replacing them soon. It also reminds me that my laptop system itself is getting old; it’s about to turn 4 this January. My desktop, too, is about to turn 4. I’m considering upgrades; I can either maintain with what I have, and keep fixing, or upgrade to something new. This is similar to my own life. I’m in a pattern of just holding on to what I have and patching it, making do; things after a while become stretched, threadbare, patchwork. This is fine if a person is completely frugal and handy, and does not mind the frugal and handy image. I do, but to a point. After that point, the appearance is that of “barely making do” in my job and lifestyle. That doesn’t win friends. That doesn’t keep the bed warm with bodies. It’s a sad fact of life, but a component of attractiveness is the ability to spend, to purchase, and display new possessions, new clothing, new style. In the past few years I have been pretty slack in buying new clothes; most people buy clothes all the time; some buy clothing in bulk at the end of every summer. Me, I buy a t-shirt here, a pair of jeans there. My casual clothes have become my work clothes, and they too are becoming threadbare and worn through. It is time to upgrade myself.

One of my recent music purchases, and now my recent fascination, is a band named Seabound. I picked up their sophomore album, “Beyond Flatline”; it is currently in high rotation on my mp3 playlist and in my car cd player. Their sound is heavily electronic and industrial, with dark-hearted sound with a touch of introspective defeat musically and lyrically. Very similar to VNV Nation and some songs by VAST and Covenant. I’ve gained a fascination with dark bands with a singular “me to the world” vision. They answer something in me, they touch a chord, and I can’t turn it away. It’s so weird. Hard to explain. I need to start writing poetry again (relax, people, you don’t have to read it. damn). If you get a chance, look up Metropolis Records and check out Seabound. I’m happy with the happenstance purchase.

There’s someone here I think I recognize from when I lived here. I should probably go ask if she is who I think she is. She’s here with her husband; they both look familiar. Heh. Well wouldn’t you know it, I know these people; they are some people I knew from a few years before I left for Austin. Totally cool people. Some chatting with them, some catching up, and I learn they are now living not in Texarkana but in Conway, Arkansas, and doing much, much better. They Got Out. I could not be happier for them.

Heh. It’s nice running into old friends at random.

Friday, November 26, 2004:
Today I did a whole lot of absolutely nothing useful. I hate days like this. I stayed up a little later last night than necessary and got some not-so-good sleep this morning (I really must discuss the freezing conditions in that bedroom with my sister). I woke up around 11, groggy as hell. Had a warm breakfast compliments of my sister, then I lazed around the apartment hanging out with the kids and watching stuff on Comedy Central. They all left around 1pm to go watch the Arkansas vs LSU game, and I had some time to go shave, shit, and shower. Left the apartment around 2:30, and drove to Schlotzskeys to see if they had CoolCloud wireless — if they did, I couldn’t pick it up because my wireless card driver did nothing but completely crash my system; the dreaded NTKernel dump. Infuriated, I gave up on the quest, shoved my laptop back in my bag and drove on.

Went to visit Phil and Bob at Moderne Primitives; visited for several hours. My visits usually are intended for just a few minutes, like 15, 20 minutes, and end up being 2 hours or so. It’s good to chat, but after being there standing around for some time I was feeling really peckish and had no choice but to leave and get some food. So here I am, IHOP again. Had a big meat-and-potatos meal. Waiting on it to sink in and recharge me; it was like I was having a sugar crash or something. So weird.

My plans for today were to go visit my core group of friends while the sun was still up and see what plans were for tonight. I have also been thinking about taking the hour-long drive up to Arkadelphia for a photo safari to take pictures of the college I attended and see what’s changed in the past 6 years since my last visit. That obviously fell through. It’s still an option for tomorrow. I could also look up my old college friends Eddie and Michelle; I understand they have their own house and are working on a family; I haven’t really communicated with them in 4 years. Would be nice to see them.

What I would like to do is spend some more time with my mother and hang out, go grab something to eat. I miss being up here for when she needs help, and these days she’s needing more than usual. It’s tough to be so far away. She still has pictures of her Red Cross volunteer trip to Florida to show me.

Tonight, it’s still early enough to comfortably visit my group of friends. Not even 8:30 yet. But it’s pushing it. I’m so distant from them as well. On my last visit the thought occurred to me that it’s not always cool to drop in unannounced at any time and just crash parties. They ribbed me about it, but it was still jovial. But the idea remains; even though I’m a friend of theirs from years back, I should make moves early enough to be more than welcome for a visit. Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest. And I don’t like being that kind of agreeable.

Damn, I’m sleepy. Time to go make some visits, else I won’t hear the end of it.

Saturday, November 27, 2004

What happened today? Well, not much of that “grab life by the horns” stuff, that is for sure. Most of the daylight was spent resting, sleeping, and napping. The time I’ve spent in this household with my nieces and nephew (and the pets) has been tenuously blessed; these kids are sharp as whips, but just you try keeping them quiet and well behaved. Heh. So the rest, any rest, is welcomed. My mother came to visit today and hang out with us as my sister got her house redecorated for christmas. Helped out with fetching some supplies for dinner, which I enjoyed with my family.

I made scarce of myself around 8pm and visited my friends over at “The Block,” as I call it. The birthday party for David was underway, and most everyone, even a few people I hadn’t met, was there. Mark, who lives in Japan, was present via teleconference on the big screen in the living room. David’s brother in law was also celebrating his birthday, so he came over to exchange gifts and say hello; brought his kids who spent most of their time there running and roughhousing. Once the kids discovered the webcam and that their mugs were on TV, their energy multiplied three-fold as they hammed it up with Mark. Lots of fun, lemmetellya. After experiencing my own family’s kids for a few days, the noise of three more kids was too much and I stepped out to the porch for a while. Played with David and Angie’s dog, a basset hound which, after hearing my friends’ tales of that dog jumping or hitting them where it counts the most, I lovingly called “The Crotch Torpedo”.

The evening over there wound down early, and some of us migrated to Liz and Doug’s house for coffee and chatter. I found out some more details about various drama circles, caught up on what’s been going on with so-and-so and what’s-her-face. Chatted about gypsies and movies, and renfest, and scarborough faire, and so on. The usual stuff. Feeling the fatigue headache and the early stages of a sugar crash (thanks to the cola and pixie stick I had earlier), I left around 1:15am. Got something to eat and headed back to the apartment. And now, here I am, in my sweats, socks, and a t-shirt hoping I don’t (but knowing I will) freeze my ass off tonight in bed.

It is not in my idiom to flaunt my nose at charity. To be honest, these accomodations at my sister’s apartment have been some of the best accomodations I’ve had in Texarkana in the ages since my mother had her own house. But after the chaos and caucophany of three kids, the cold, hard, creaking bed, and my days-long exposure to the allergy-enticing pets, I will be very glad to be driving back home tomorrow. I love my family, I miss them. I wish I could take them with me to what I think is a better town, but it’s nice knowing I have my own place to go to.

I plan to spend the latter hours of my time here with my mother, to catch up, talk, go have some dinner. She still has pictures from Florida to show me. I’d like to see about helping her out a little bit financially since she’s been out of work for a few weeks; her return to work doesn’t seem eminent at all. And this worries me to no end; it bothers me that I can’t be here, in the same town, to offer help and care to my mother. It seems that job is resting on the shoulders of my sister, and that’s just not completely fair. All I can do is call more often and send money.

Optimally, I’d like to be back in Austin before midnight which means I should leave and be rolling no later than 5pm. I keep hearing rumors of a chance for rain on my drive back. That’ll add to the travel time for sure, but I’m no stranger to rain suddenly appearing for my return to Austin. The rain will fall lightly as I leave, then come down hard at sunset, usually 10 minutes after my departure, and stay with me until Henderson, TX. Seems to be the usual story. I’d like one good, clear, decent drive home. The drive up here, though it was windy, was smooth and pleasant. I’d like the drive home to be just as blessed.

My eyes are heavy from sleep, my ass is hurting from sitting on the floor with the laptop, and Chicane is playing on the Winamp. I listened to him back when I moved to Austin, and his music was my copilot on a lot of my driving back and forth from Texarkana and from Renfest back in 2000; it’s good driving music, and it only whets my mood to hit the road. So I bid you g’nite. G’nite.