(Phaysis)

So, it seems your humble author has finally gone and done it. I drank the Kool-Aid(tm). And now you can find me on Facebook. No sense linking, because most of you are already on my friends list.

And why did I do it? Kinda because I don’t hang out with anyone. There’s work, coffee, home, and there’s not too many people at each that I chat with. Y’know? More my fault than anyone else’s. So Facebook is a stand-in, a proxy for friendship. I always say “friendship is proximity”, and I still believe it, so if this is what I need to do to keep my friendships from fading completely, then joining is what I shall do.

However, I do blame my recent Facebook fetishism for my journal’s neglect. Funny, but I’m doing the same exact things with Facebook that caused me to leave IRC: mumble rambling WTF-isms and wait for responses. And wait. And wait. Projects kinda take a back seat. Funny, that.

So yeah. Find me there. If you ask nicely, I might accept your friendship.

Why do I settle for failure? Why does anybody settle for failure? Putting up with failure for so long. Why do it? Powerlessness? Tolerance for bullshit? Passive aggression? Hoping it’ll get better while investing nothing in it. Things fail, and we just go along with it. No fight left. No strength. It’s not patience, it’s just muffled intolerance.

I just…settle…for less than the best.

Is this a function of turning the corner into middle age? What’s with the fear of rising up to Change Things? Fear of failure is inviting failure. I want to keep going along with the shitty things in my life, and that is most troubling to me. It hurts to make change; it costs a lot of effort. I know the rewards are worth more than the investment. I know all this shit. So why remain? Why persist?